Decades of Inspiring Wellbeing

This blog post is the second in a three part series, flick back to read One Serendipitous Event and look out for An Emotionally Charged Woman in future posts to understand the whole story.

A bit about me!

I am a natural teacher. My earliest memory is when I was 8 taking gymnastic class during lunch. And these classes were not just the odd instruction thrown here and there I had structure; lesson plans, attendance lists and a reward system when my friends could do a cartwheel and forward roll, without putting their hands down to get up. Only a few months ago I stumbled across an exercise book from back then and it made me realise teaching truly is a common thread through my life. I went on to complete a Bachelor in Human Movement helping me understand the science behind why the body moves the way it does and a Diploma in Education to certify my already teaching. I spent ten years bouncing around our state teaching in the public school system. The reason why I chose to gain experience in a range of schools and areas was because I had a curiosity for what was beyond Perth. When I was a child I recall my Dad inspiring me with stories about our amazing country and I must explore the land in my backyard before going abroad. For me teaching was the obvious conduit for this. I finally left teaching to be a full time mum, interestingly enough still bouncing around WA though this time for my husbands work. At the point of having 2 boys I began searching for a manual, you know the one that does not exist on how to raise children and not lose your mind! I wanted to be the best mum I could and it was my responsibility to find this. Anyhow I began to read Buddhism for Mothers and this in turn taught me a lot about stillness, living in the present moment and acting from a place of mindfulness. Every decision I was starting to make was a conscious one and I was feeling a lot more control, calm and joy in my life. When my third child, my daughter, was eighteen months I enrolled to study yoga and began teaching to men and women during the mining boom.

And I want to share this story with you about my Dad.

So I am 17 and I am pretty much self-involved because who isn’t at 17, right? I have a boyfriend, I’m a prefect and I host parties at my house on the weekends that my mum and dad are away. Life is amazing and I’m going well.

One day I arrive home from school and I head towards my front door as I usually do but I feel something is wrong. Have you ever had that feeling when you intuitively know something is wrong, though you do not know what it is and you just discount it.

So I walk up to my front door and I love these doors because these doors I designed with my Dad. Jarrah double doors much larger than normal with polished wooden slates evenly spaced between double glazed glass. They are beautiful and I am proud of them. Every time I stand in front of them I get a little tug in my heart because they are a reminder of the project between my Dad and I. My time with my Dad was precious, he worked a lot, he was an entrepreneur; he built gold mines, developed property and ran other business. He would either be at work or in his home office working.

Anyhow I walk in the house and my uncle greets me and just then that feeling got huge and I’m thinking what is my uncle doing here? And I go to the worst, though what is the worst in my 17-year-old mind? They found out about that party or I dented the car… I do not compute my brain goes numb and I followed my uncle down the stairs. I remember not wanting to go down the stairs though I go down because I was 17 and I did what I was told.

So I arrived at the bottom of the sweeping spiral stair case to see my Mum sitting in a chair with her brother supporting her – and I could see she had been crying. My mind had gone blank…so I waited… and that’s when they told me my Dad has a terminal brain tumour and he wasn’t going to live much longer. He was 41. I cannot begin to explain what being 17 and hearing that kind of news does to you. All sorts of things were racing through my head and nothing was racing through my head. So how do you react to that type of news? I remember running and running that type of running where nothing is an obstacle and no-one is going to catch you and thinking what could I’ve done differently, I’m 17 and I know no different? What could I’ve done to save my Dad?

Well I couldn’t save him, he died and it left a huge hole in my heart as well as a lot of guilt because at 17 I decided I had not spent enough time with him, I didn’t get what I needed and I could have done more.

There are times when I believe my current course of work, my dharma, is because I am trying to save someone else’s Dad, son, husband, brother. What is interesting is back in 1994, when my Dad was diagnosed he turned to the work of Deepak Chopra to help him on his journey. My Dad introduced the 17-year-old-me to the concept of meditation.